Sunday, February 11, 2007

Time for a Vocab Quiz

I’m not proud of this, but occasionally I have a problem with swearing. Actually, I don’t have a problem; I’m very good at it. A well-placed curse word can do wonders to sum up a problem or punctuate a statement. But since I’ve had children my swearing has caused a few problems because I don't like the, “Do as I say, not as I do” concept. (I try very hard not to swear in front of them, but we are in the car together a lot.)

Well, the other day I was listening to Neal Boortz talk about who would be the Democratic candidate for president. He was talking about how the race is really going to be between Hillary Clinton (save us from that!) and Barack Obama and it dawned on me that “Barack Obama” sounds like a swear word. Say this out loud: “What the Barack Obama are you two doing down there?”

I mentioned this to Sean and he didn’t seem all that impressed, but I was determined to give it a try. So when the time seemed right (about two seconds after I told Sean of my amazing discovery) I yelled, “Barack Obama, why aren’t those kids in bed yet?”

The kids didn’t think it was that funny but I did. And when you’re a homeschooling mom who just doesn’t get out that much anymore, you’ll take any laugh you can get.

I’ve got nothing against Mr. Obama. And quite honestly, if he can keep Hillary from winning the nomination I’ll be deeply indebted to him. (No delusions here, though. She’s going to cream him in the primaries thanks to stupid women who will vote for her because she’s got a vagina and because she wants to give health care to everyone. And who’s going to pay for that? Is she going to plant a money tree in the Rose Garden? But I digress...) His name is a near-perfect substitute for a several not-so-pleasant words that have become rooted in my vocabulary and if simply saying the name “Barack” will transplant them, I’m all for it. I’m sure Sean will be on board, eventually, and the kids, too. But if my new slang never catches on, I'll just say, oh well, what the Barack.

6 comments:

  1. Anonymous1:56 PM

    I love the idea of using Liberal's names as curse words. It makes complete sense. Obama is the closest thing Liberals have to a god (or at lease they treat him like one) so BarackObama would be a suitable replacement for GD. A quick word of caution... while his voice lacks that endearing, high-pitched shriek of Hillary's, their politics are very similar. Both would rather give our money to trees than national defense.

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  2. Anonymous2:05 PM

    FYI... his full name is Barack Hussein Obama. Substitute a 'S' for the 'B' and you've got both the worst dictator and terrorist of our time.

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  3. FYI: I'm using his name as a substitute for h*** or d***.

    I know he and Hillary would both be bad for the country, but I think he'd have a harder time being elected. While they both have many strikes against them, I think he has more, especially when the "he has no experience" and "he's not really black" crowd gets going.

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  4. Anonymous3:21 PM

    Okay, those last comments were far too serious and obviously not from a person who spends too much time with his/her children. I read your blog and reasons for substituting his name and I laughed OUT LOUD. I totally agree with you and I intend to try it out on my own kids! I think it was very funny. Meanwhile, stay warm!!!!

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  5. Anonymous9:53 AM

    I'm with Linda! I was ROFL and even passed your idea on to Jay and my parents (who have been taking care of Adam and all of us since we brought baby Benjamin home last weekened). Loved it, loved it, loved it!!!

    /tina

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  6. What the Barach! Go to Hillary! Obama! To Hillary in a handbasket! That pretty much sums up how I'd feel if either of them becomes President.

    On a more serious note, do as I say not as I do only applies when you excuse your own behavior while expecting your children to do something else. Christian parents who admit their own sin and confesse it encourage their children to do the same. Christians aren't perfect; we are forgiven, and we forgive 70 times 7 if necessary. On needing to be forgiven, most of us need at least that!

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